Alex Needs.

I thought I'd type "Alex needs" into Google (totally stole the idea from Serena) and see what came up. Apparently--in the viritual world of computers, this is what I need:

Note: These are all direct quotes--no jokes! The bolded ones are evidently my favorites and I've included a summary below, enjoy!

1. Alex needs your help.
2. Alex needs more than just a rat trap for this vermin.
3. Alex needs you!
4. Alex needs a job!
5. Alex really needs a No. 1 Receiver.
6. Alex needs a new layout.
7. Alex needs a new kidney in order to live.
8. Alex needs to read this--how to fly a helicopter.
9. Alex needs to go to Venice and find Scorpia to find her destiny.
10. Alex needs to get sleep, she looks awful and the bags under her eyes attest to her lack of good health.
11. Alex needs to freak out.
12. Alex needs to show something special.
13. Alex needs Ralph.
14. Alex needs you to make a difference.
15. Alex needs training, dog obedience would be great.
16. Alex needs to be in a one pet family.
17. Alex needs about 10 cardboard boxes to build a decent-sized spaceship.
18. Alex needs a steak.
19. Alex needs to stop drinking coffee.
20. Alex needs to keep her witness a live for the next three days.
21. Alex needs a scapegoat.
22. Alex needs a new nickname, I'm thinking McCreamy.
23. Alex needs to use her rotating helicopter ability to safely float down to the bottom level while avoiding the walls lined with spikes.
24. Alex needs crayons.
25. Alex needs a microphone and a stand for her second banjo.

According the world wide web, I'm some breed of dog who is a delightfully tasteful treat topped with whipcream! Using my helicopter skills I gained from reading a particular article, I plan to fly away in my cardboard ship with my witness that I must keep alive for three whole days. Carefully, I plan to avoid the walls of spikes which will be difficult considering I am a) a dog in need of obedience classes b) overloaded on caffienne from coffee and c) in need of a new liver.

The End.